When the psychological maturity of the couple is not synchronized, as the more mature party, how to do?
First of all, there is no such thing as a fully synchronized, co-frequency couple. If there is no fundamental conflict between the two sides, it is normal and acceptable to have differences in other aspects.
As the saying goes, children are good for you and husbands are good for others. People often compare their other halves with other people’s spouses. Hear others accuse oneself of that the son of scabbers and bad deeds, the mouth comforts, the heart actually bursts of secretly happy; See other people’s family that smart, understanding, surface praise, actually very jealous.
In fact, other people’s object no matter how good or bad, it is other people’s business, their marriage life, need two people to operate together, the responsibility of the 50-50 account. Rather than envy others a happy marriage, it is better to see the sage, from their own start to improve, perfect.
In a couple, one party can see the other’s shortcomings, often because he is more mature in this respect, grow up better. If the other person can recognize their differences and work in the same direction, everyone will be happy. The basis for cooperation is undermined if one side is cynical and accusatory towards the other. Negation, attack, will naturally provoke defense, counterattack, both sides you come to me, the result can only be a chicken feathers.
When two people grow out of sync, the test is the relative maturity of the coping wisdom.
A better strategy is to lead by example instead of pointing out what is wrong.
Since each other there is a need for growth, as the most intimate partner, have a duty to do “cover”, in the aspect of human behavior, remind, warning of “secretary” and “assistant”, at the same time, in order to better cope with model to an example for each other, make the effect of the two modes to persuade work, let the other side in the comparison to learn to take the initiative to adjust.
In reality, there is usually little difference in maturity between couples in conflict. The more mature you are, the more tolerant and stable you will be, rather than caring about everything. As the saying goes, when two couples quarrel, it is the tip of a needle against the wheat, a half jin, a 82, who is not stronger than who. If you really feel that you are more mature than your partner, you should have more tolerance and patience. Like climbing a mountain, since we are partners in climbing together, we should understand and take care of each other. If you are strong, take on more; Walk fast, explore the road, not far from the front of waiting, encourage. In this way, we can walk through mountains and rivers together and witness the scenery of life.
For the more mature, the relative inadequacy of a spouse is a form of exercise and prod. The kind of person who is care grew up, although happy, but the growth of the inner behind, in the couple’s common life, is a lack of sense of worth.
A person’s growth, may go very fast, two people grow together, can go better, further.